Confessions of a Starving Mystery Writer

Decaying Monument to Detroit's Glory Days

For a brief moment, I was in it. You know what I'm talking about. The zone of euphoria in which the creative juices flow and words pour out your fingertips, effortlessly. And it's the good stuff that flows not crap. I was there briefly a week or so ago and I want to return. This is where Michael Jordon went during 50 point games, where Yo Yo Ma goes during a performance, where Leonardo DaVinci and Michael Angelo went during their painting. The throes of creation. Somehow I lost it. I was tooling along fine, finished a few short stories that came out really well and then nothing the well ran dry, someone turned of the spiggot. How do you conjure this up? How do you return the that place where the magic happens? Life seems to get in the way. I think I'll drink about it.

Problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them. Albert Einstein

The architectural beauty of Detroit marches slowly into oblivion.

You get a 15 minute face-to-face pitch session with an agent or publisher that you are very interested in hooking up with...professionally. What do you say? What do you hand them? What is your goal?

A man walks into a bar. He sees a good looking, smartly dressed woman perched on a bar stool. He walks up behind her and says, "Hi there good looking, how's it going? She turns around, faces him, looks him straight in the eye and says, "Listen, I'll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place, it doesn't matter. I've been doing it ever since I got out of college. I just flat out love it." He says, "No kidding, I'm a lawyer too! What firm are you with?"

Show me a person who's never failed and I'll show you a failure. Unknown I do not fear failure. I only fear the "slowing up" of the engine inside of me which is pounding, saying, "Keep going, someone must be on top, why not you?" George S. Patton I don't measure a man's success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom. George S. Patton

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation” Henry David Thoreau Chapter 1 The sea has long been the place of intrigue, battles, struggles and tragic death. Living close by the sea, I became aware of death at an early age. Mother ocean claimed many people close to me by the time I reached adulthood. The intrigue, battles, and struggles came later. Monday, mid-afternoon, a sweltering late August breeze picked up from the south and induced an instant and persistent all over body sweat. The Atlantic Ocean boiled frothy white and choppy. I pointed the bow west to leave the protection of the Albemarle Sound through the Oregon Inlet at the Outer Banks of North Carolina. Not the perfect day for a pleasure cruise but with a topless thonged tanned beauty on the bow with drink in hand, a well stocked bar and galley-- summer’s end was too close to waste the opportunity for a short day sail. The wind whistled through the rigging, topside speakers were loud enough to be heard over the wind a

Check out Tess Gerritsen's Podcast " Imagine Waking Up in a Body Bag ". Let me know what you think. Is this the new wave in book advertising? For anyone interested there is a free Podcast library at Apple's iTunes Music Store. It requires a download but it's worth it. There are 356 free podcasts related to books. Some are a little strange but cool none the less.

I am curious if anyone else is going to attend or has in the past attended the Love is Murder Writer's Conference February 3-5 in Chicago. David Morrell(Author of First Blood, Rambo), J.A. Konrath, and several other authors will be in attendance. Ths will be my first conference and would like to know what to expect and how to get the most out of it. Any pearls of wisdom would be greatly appreciated.

The Crab Nebula 

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. e. e. cummings I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart. e. e. cummings

For those of you playing along at home, we had yesterday a hypothetical posed. A fat job offer that would pull a writer off his or her chosen path to bestsellerdom. Within this hypothetical situation, I would like to explain the descision made and reasoning behind it. Suppose, you train your entire life for a specific marathon. You begin the race, and a few miles into it, someone runs up beside you and says, "Hey, ya know over in Chicago, there's this bigger better race. Huge prize money, bennies, prestige, the works. I can get you in. You want to go? But you gotta go right now." Do you break your stride and quit? Writing, for me is a calling. A calling that has been whispering in my ear for years, slowly getting louder over decades, until now it is screaming at me. I decided to make writing my career four months ago. The first two months I read every book I could get my hands on; about writing, the industry, mystery and thriller related books, blogs, websites, everything

" Joining the chorus of a million big skeptics, Oprah Winfrey has withdrawn her support for embattled memoirist James Frey. Winfrey confronted the A Million Little Pieces author during a live taping of her show on Thursday, stating that she was "really embarrassed" by her initial decision to stand up for him in the face of allegations that he fabricated large chunks of his book. "It is difficult for me to talk to you because I feel duped. I really feel duped," Winfrey said to Frey. The Queen of Daytime catapulted A Million Little Pieces to best-seller status after she selected the so-called memoir for her book club. Thanks in large part to Winfrey's endorsement, Frey's supposedly true tale of his struggles with addiction and stint in rehab sold 1.77 million copies last year, making it the number-two-selling book of the year behind Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. However, after an in-depth investigation by the Smoking Gun Website called major

I've got a peculiar weakness for criminals and artists-neither takes life as it is. Any tragic story has to be in conflict with things as they are. Stanley Kubrick Me too Stanley...me too.

Where my head's at... 

Suppose you are tooling along down your new chosen career path, and a blast from the past, calls you up and offers you a six figure job with bennies, a car, travel, and a paid move to a big city - would you take it? -knowing it means 60 to 70 hour weeks, high stress, and no more writing time... Would you take it?

We are fed it every day for most of our lives, by television, our politicians, religious leaders, news anchors. It surrounds, engulfs, and consumes us - Bullshit. "Reality" TV Shows, Frey, Jerry Springer, the talking heads - I could go on and on and on. Truth is in very short supply in America today. Princeton Professor Emeritas Harry G. Frankfurt recently published a very short philosophy book on the subject, titled appropriately, " ON BULLSHIT ". It's about 100 pages and a quick read. The blurb on Bullshit: " One of the most salient features of our culture is that there is so much bullshit," Harry G. Frankfurt writes, in what must surely be the most eyebrow-raising opener in modern philosophical prose. Everyone knows this. Each of us contributes his share. But we tend to take the situation for granted." This compact little book, as pungent as the phenomenon it explores, attempts to articulate a theory of this contemporary scourge--what it is, w

Listen, the next revolution is gonna be a revolution of ideas. Bill Hicks Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God. Lenny Bruce As long as one person lives in darkness then it seems to be a responsibility to tell other people. Bill Hicks

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there's no rehab for stupidity. Chris Rock

Ok, there is this woman who has inspired me since I met her. A mother of a couple of beautiful young women, a prolific yet unknown writer, and married to a really talented musician. Many of my friends and I have been goading, coaxing, and badgering her to blog. She has resisted every pitch we have thrown at her. Yet, today, for what ever reason she has decided to Wade Into The Shallow Waters. Please check out her blog and say hi at http://mtwillard.blogspot.com/ . I think she may shock and amaze you....

We are the sum total of our experiences. The good, the bad, the ugly. Writers, good ones anyway, must know themselves. Writing, for me, has been cathartic and in many ways an introspective exploration of self, motivations, perceptions, and realities. In a recent blog by Jaye Wells, she explores personality tests in detail. I took the quick down and dirty personality test of four questions and found the results to be strikingly accurate. So accurate in fact that it gave me interesting insight into motivations and actions of my past and why I have ended up as a writer. Yesterday, in a blog with Ivan Prokopchuk , we explored why tortured writers pour themselves out through their pen. Truth, somehow bleeds through the bullshit. Honesty is somehow apparent on its face. If you are interested, take the test and let me know how accurate the results are. I think to know yourself makes one a better writer, both in style and character creation. Because as we all know there is a little bit of us

A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool. William Shakespeare

Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens. Jimi Hendrix

TV coming soon to a cell phone...in your hand. MSNBC Reports: "Nokia, Intel, Motorola and other wireless equipment makers have formed an alliance to promote an emerging technology standard for delivering live TV to mobile phones. The partners said they would work together to develop and spread the use of DVB-H (Digital Video Broadcasting-Handheld) – an open standard for broadcasting TV on wireless equipment – through a group dubbed the Mobile DTV Alliance. " Convergence is coming folks.

Now live: www.rjbaker.net Check it out and let me know what you think. It has many, many, bugs but you can get the gist of where I'm heading. This has sucked many hours out of my life, but I think I like the final product. Anyway, opinions and suggestions are valued. Thanks. RJB

I asked a few women that I know for input on the ultimate character traits for a female heroine in development. So far this is what's been told to me: In Search of a perfect female character for novel Characteristics: Inside: Smart (not a genius, but bright, and quick) Interest in some of the following: current events / history / politics / culture Independent - can take care of herself (NOT needy) Good sense of humor (and can laugh at herself) Non-judgmental - can see things from perspectives other then her own Opinionated and respects that others opinions Spirited/Passionate/a mild temper Sassy but not (too) cynical Sensitive/Caring Confidence, it's quite the aphrodisiac, (in men as well). (Per Pammy) Loves Sex with the one she loves(OK, I added this one) Flaws, (per Dawn) Outside: Attractive but not drop-dead. Think about it -- most really gorgeous women, have never had to want/work for anything. They usually are not deep in character. Make her attractive, but believable. An

You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there. Yogi Berra

For Anne & MG-I aim to please 

Sorry for the piss poor content of late. I have been diligently working on my main webpage, calender, forum, and short stories for submission. I hope to have the website up tommorow and all of the short stories in the mail Monday morning. I hope to return to more substantive content. I have been experimenting to see what people like. Any suggestions?

A few lawyer jokes for those that appreciate lawyers as much as I do. I'm entitled, for those who don't know, I am one. How can you tell the difference between a dead skunk and a dead attorney on the road? The vultures aren't gagging over the skunk. (varition of ending: skid marks) What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a slimy, bottom dwelling, scum sucker. The other is a fish. What's the difference between an attorney and a pit bull? Jewelry. If you are stranded on a desert island with Osama, Sadam, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do? Shoot the lawyer twice. What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention? The caterer. What do lawyers do after they die? They lie still. What do lawyers use for birth control? Their personalities. I've got lotta more...check back next week.

I have suffered from being misunderstood, but I would have suffered a hell of a lot more if I had been understood. Chase after the truth like all hell and you'll free yourself, even though you never touch its coat tails. Clarence Darrow

M.J. Rose turns her blog over to a pyschologist every Friday for analysis of writers issues. An excerpt: "Every Friday I turn this blog into a couch and let Dr. Sue offer up some writer’s therapy. Don’t forget to send her your questions – Dr.Sue at mindspring.com This week’s column is especially interesting I think – with an intro from Dr. O’Doherty. A LONG AND WHINING ROAD? A few weeks ago, an author (“Sensitive Novelist”) wrote to express dismay that some of her friends do not read her books and, in fact, seem uninterested in her career. She asked for help in understanding her reaction of hurt and in overcoming her sensitivity to these perceived rejections...." This post was inspired from Jaye Well's Blog of today.

I am submitting five more short stories over the weekend, and as is common practice in the business and legal world, I am considering including the following sentence in the cover letter: "If I have not heard from your magazine within 35 days, I will assume you have no interest in the enclosed short story and will submit it to other magazines for consideration." This is, of course, an attempt to deal with the dreaded "no simultaneous submission" policy of many magazines. I would like to stay within guideline rules but do not want to wait indefinitely for an answer. What do you think?

Cravin' Buffett, Corona with a lime, the boat, and.....

You do ill if you praise, but worse if you censure, what you do not understand. Leonardo da Vinci

This is right up the Bunion crowd's alley. Check it out: http://www.chumfm.com/MorningShow/bits/march24.swf Sent to me by 10-8-ious - one of the asylum crew...

The mystery of Edgar Allan Poe continues. Beginning in 1949, Poe's grave has been visited every year by a mystery man, during the early hours of Poe's birthday, January 19th. It has been reported that a man draped in black with a silver-tipped cane, kneels at the grave for a toast of Martel Cognac and leaves the half-full bottle and three red roses. The three red roses supposedly are in memory of Poe himself, his mother, and his wife. Poe is believed to be buried on the grounds of what is now the University of Maryland Law School in Baltimore. Considered by many to be the progenitor of detective and crime fiction in the United States, his cause of death at the age of 40, and his actual burial place remain shrouded in mystery and controversy. Have a shot of Cognac today and think of Edgar... From childhood's hour I have not been As others were; I have not seen As others saw; I could not bring My passions from a common spring. From the same source I have not taken My sorrow;

There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time. Malcolm X

Drunk 

Moon's Eye View 

If you were submitting a short story for possible publication, would you: A.) Submit to highest paying magazine regardless of genre? B.) Submit to lesser paying genre related magazine because of possiblilty of recognition from genre specific market and possible entry for genre awards? C.) Submit it to non-paying genre magazines that are relatively likely to publish the story? D.) Submit simultainiously to A., B., & C. ? Then chose from whomever accepts-if any. E). Shove the story in a drawer and drink about it? This is the quandry. Let me know what you think.

For a long time now I have tried simply to write the best I can. Sometimes I have good luck and write better than I can. It's none of their business that you have to learn how to write. Let them think you were born that way. Ernest Hemingway

What are the best opening lines in lterature? Your Genre? Your all time favorites? I personally struggle the most to create compelling opening and closing sentences. "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times..." Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities "We were about to give up and call it a night when somebody dropped a girl off the bridge" John D. McDonald, Darker Than Amber What is your favorites? In your genre?

Creation of Adam by Michael Angelo 

The question isn't who is going to let me; it's who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand

I was trying to stay away from this and Blogshares but in the interest of continuity and fairplay here you go(for my one fan that gives a shit): Four jobs you have had in your life: Dishwasher Soldier Turnaround Specialist Pizza Flipper Four movies you watch over and over: Pulp Fiction Monte Python's Meaning of Life Wallstreet Snatch Four places you've lived: In my head In my car On my boat Lawton, Ok Four Shows you love to watch: Charlie Rose Show Sopranos Inside the Actor's Studio Dinner For Five(on IFC) Four places you've been on vacation: Las Vegas Venice Singapore Venezuela Four of your favourite foods: Prime Rib Veal Parm Lobster Shrimp Four places you'd rather be right now: On my sailboat and in the Caribean or French Riviera Venice, Italy Paris #1 on the NYT(if this not available in a loving woman's....arms) Four sites I visit daily: Google News Blogger Booknotes Modern Drunkard Four bloggers you are tagging: Alphabeter Microe 10-8-ious Jaye Wells Four s

What moves you? Art? Music? Literature? Life? Blues and writing have many parallels. What does "The Blues" have to do with writing? I saw the Bluesman Cedell Davis' story in the documentary You See Me Laughin' and it moved me, deeply. Emotionally. Cedell Davis was born into the poverty and racism of the Mississippi Delta in 1927. He learned to play the harminica and guitar at an early age but between the ages of nine and ten he was struck down with Polio. His hands atrophied from disease, he was no longer able to play guitar or harmonica. He was right handed and unfortunately, Polio took complete use of it. Not knowing there were rules, norms, and conventions in music, it took Cedell two years to rethink and retool the way he played guitar. Since he couldn't use his right hand, he flipped the guitar over and began to play left handed, upside down. Because his left hand was afflicted as well, he adapted a butter knife to use as a slide, and different tuning to al

"In the name of God, stop a moment, cease your work, look around you." Leo Tolstoy

10. Running out of beer cans to return for gas money 9. Running out of crap to sell on eBay for paper, printer ink, stamps, envelopes, and YES, SASEs 8. Reaquiring a taste for 10/$1 Ramin Noodle Soup from college days 7. Start shopping at Save-a-lot where yes sports fans you really save a lot 6. Beer consumption increases and goes from $6 beers at the pub to $6 cases from Walmart 5. You go from 12 Year Old Glenlevit Scotch to month old Aristocrat 4. You go from $50 bottles of wine to looking for $2 wine ala Two-Buck-Chuck & eyeing Ripple 3. European vacation goes from a week in Venice, Italy to a trip to the corner store for #4,5,&6 2. Significant other shit cans you for lack of ambition and attentiveness And the number one reason: 1. Blogging becomes more interesting and time consuming then sex. I"ll post the top ten reasons its great to be The Starving Mystery Writer when the above go away.

Any man who afflicts the human race with ideas must be prepared to see them misunderstood. H.L. Mencken This Post Inspired by a comment of Ivan Prokopchuk .

I am curious as to the narrative style readers and writers prefer in the various genres. I like to read and write in the mystery/thriller and hardboiled crime genres. I prefer first person narrative because it allows me into the protagonist's thoughts - in an intimate way. It allows me to relate, very personally, to the characters. Elmore Leonard is one of the few authors in this genre that uses the third person narrative and does it well. I have read some novels where the writer switches between the two narratives. These seem to be a harder read. Please tell your genre, which narrative you prefer, and why. It will be interesting to see the results.

Diego Rivera Mural at the Detroit Art Museum

Last night, I was at the local pub, throwing back a few cold ones, and discussing settings for short stories and novels with a buddy. The subject turned to a recurring theme in most of my short stories and novel: Detroit, though in most I don't name it. He was emphatic that if I were going to use Detroit as a setting then I had better go there and get to know it as a city and understand its culture. Yesterday, I had similar conversation with a novelest friend that is writing a series. He is making a certain type of animal a reoccuring character in his novels. I was intrigued and have been pondering the plot possiblities and parallels of a city as a character too. All of the authors I admire use a city as a theme or character in their books; Hammet, Chandler, Connelly, Grisham, Dehane, all flavor their stories with the true local vibe that permates each respective city. The cities themselves become alive and as I read their stories, I want to be there, walk the streets, and particip

"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race." Calvin Coolidge

Unattainable beauty of Nature and the Universe: A photo of the Orion Nebula taken by the Hubble telescope.

What do you get when you mix, Oprah, a Bestselling Author, and allegations of a pack of lies? LAWYERS. Lots of 'em. Ok, I couldn't give a shit about celebs that end up getting their mugshot taken for personal indiscretions, but I have to give it to The Smoking Gun folks. They fucking ROCK. Check out their posting of a letter sent to them by James Frye's lawyers, in which the last line threatens: "Any publication disseminated or broadcast of any portion of this letter constitues a breach of confidence and a violation of the Copyright act." They didn't publish a portion. They published all of it . As a lawyer, I read that last statement and laughed my ass off. That rates right up there with the "facts" in Fryes memoir. The only solice is that the posted letter likely cost Frye between one to five thousand dollars. The internet may yet restore my faith in truth, justice, and the American way.

New Online Service to Explode on Scene 

Coming very soon is a new online music and literature site featuring the work of struggling writers, musicians and artists. This website will provide an outlet for those who seek a paying outlet for their work, but for whatever reason are unable to penetrate the traditional publishing market place. No SASE required. The site will provide affordable downloadable music, short stories, excerpts of books, audiobooks, and various merchandising. Stay tuned.

Faded Glory 

The 1st draft of the end of the short story originally called "Inside" is below. If this is your first visit please read the prior post . I just finished it this morning. Please let me know what you think. I left the room bewildered. Who was this man? My Grandfather? A painter? An artist? I walked down the hallway and entered his bedroom. Seventies’ vintage furniture, modest but functional, were arranged for ease of use. Lime greens and bright yellows, long out of fashion. At the foot of the bed was a faded green footlocker with an afghan checkered draped over it. I pushed the afghan aside, unclasped the buckles and opened it. The smell of mothballs overwhelmed me. Inside were the faded remnants of 85 years of life. A government issue .45 in a leather cases placement on top of a folded green dress uniform, gave the appearance of a paper weight on a stack of neat boundless of a life lived. A full breast of medal ribbons hung from the breast of the uniform. More medals that I h

Faded Footlocker 

I was inspired after yesterday's heated debate over the SASE to write this blog. Ok, that dead horse has been beaten into a bloody heap, but... A guantlet must be run, and this guantlet is one serious writers must be prepared for. Most of us look to how-to-books, published authors, and industry gurus for guidance in our attempt to become published. We must, however, temper these inputs with our own common sense, morality, and business sense. There was a movie a couple decades ago, starring Clint Eastwood as a cop, called The Gauntlet. The premise: a cop had to get a witness to the courthouse of a corrupt city. He had conflicts with all levels of government and the climax was a run up Main Street in a self-armored Greyhound bus. Every policeman, SWAT team, marksman, etc., took shots at the cop and his witness on their run for the saftey of the courthouse. Writers must put on their heavy battle armor of good writing and confidence to run the guantlet of the publishing industry. It i

American book-buying public duped again? The Washington Post reported today author James Frey's publisher, Random House, will offer refunds to disgruntled book buyers after allegations that his memoir "A Million Little Pieces" was not factual. Frey's book has sold approximately 1.77 million copies and was reported to be the best selling non-fiction book of 2005. An exerpt: "Central to Frey's book, published in 2003, is his assertion that he was charged with assaulting an Ohio police officer with his car, with inciting a riot, with possession of crack cocaine and felony drunk driving -- charges that he wrote resulted in a three-month prison term. The Smoking Gun, owned by Court TV, reported that most of those claims were not borne out by police records or by interviews with police and court officials. The Web site published the police officer's report of the key 1992 incident which shows Frey was found drunk in his car without a driver's license but di

Don't Bring Me Down painting by Sarah Jane Szikora  

Ok, I think too much digital ink and time has been spilled on the subject but since Ms. Snark didn't post my comment on her blog, I feel drawn into the fray. For those few of you who don't know an SASE is a self addressed stamped envelope usually requested or required by agents, publishers, magazines, and others for inclusion with any submittals of work for review. This morning, the blogshere is a buzz with two opposing views, one by rising author Joe Konrath , and the other by anonomous literary agent, Miss Snark . And the comment I made that was not posted: "A Tale of Two Tragedies: First, a good writer fails to find the good agent because an SASE is not included in the submittal and the agent refuses to read writer's work. Second, a good agent fails to find the good writer because the writer didn't include an SASE. What a shitty plot. You decide." Ok, I gave her qudos for her reading 100 synopses, but quashing freedom of speech -that's just wrong. Ok, m

Camels killed him. Not the humped type, the non-filtered type. The kind cigarette companies’ peddle to children today from a mammal in a black leather jacket, sunglasses, and walks upright – the cool camel. Two packs a day, since he was twelve. The old murderer finally got his due – an agonizing death and sent straight to hell. That’s what they said at his funeral and wake at Jackson State Prison. Whispered really. He was Eighty-five years old, my grandfather. I didn’t know him and really only saw him twice in my life. Once, in the cheap coffin at the funeral home provided by the state of Michigan, and once at his sentencing. Both times he looked frail and old. Lifeless. Soulless. His eyes had a disinterested, unrepentant quality. He glared at the sentencing judge, as he received the life sentence, he shrugged with the import of a speeding ticket. Most of his life the black sheep of our family, and later a complete outcast, he was born in the depression era. He suffered poverty and rac

Around the Corner painting by Sarah Jane Szikora

The road to success for a successful professional fiction writer appears to have three levels; publication, mid-list, bestsellerdom. Any author, if they gain entry into the land of the published, can travel these roads. Potholes abound on each. I have yet to figure out how a writer can make a living writing short fiction, unless they do it prolifically, with cross genre and non-fiction magazines. So, what follows pertains to the novelist. Publication is not the panacea. It's the ticket at the gate. Many first-time published authors sell poorly and are never published again. Thier books quickly go out of print and can be found, if at all, on Amazon for a penny. Therefore, selection of a supportive publishing house is crucial. Gone are the days where big houses nurture an author over several books. Some smaller genre publishers may still do these but most have limited marketing support and budgets. Most published authors must diligently self-promote to advance to the second level of